It's been a long few weeks.
I'm trying to be mindful, which means that I am trying to be the exact opposite of me. That shit is exhausting. Not only for me, but also for the people directly involved with me, whether they have the joy of listening to me bitch about sweating while I'm cooking [YES, IT IS ALL STILL FUCKING DELICIOUS] or the dubious joy of getting texts from me about hating every single person in the universe, including Schrodinger's fucking cat. Who exists. Fuck you, Schrodinger. I solved your equation.
I spent Sunday at the pool with a friend of mine. Our kids have been friends since 1st grade. She's also been dealing with down in the dumps feelings, and I know that part of it is that our kids are leaving soon, but it's also that we're at loose ends in the world in general. I feel like I can't quite get a grasp on who I am.
I may start trying on personas. Just for funsies. I think the next one is going to be Ice Queen because I'm tired of being so goddamn hot stupid hot flashes are the worst in the world. My luck? I'd probably end up Slushy Queen because did I tell you about the several nights where I slept with the AC on, the ceiling fan on, and a fan blowing DIRECTLY ON ME and I was still hot? I'm coming up with The Ice Pajama-Rama, for ladies of a certain age who are tired of being so motherfucking hot.
God. Did you miss me?