Random is better than nothing.

I had several attempted blog posts before this one.  Here's a nice amalgamation:

** I've not purchased much from them, but sweet god, the people at JCrew are AMAZING.  I had to return something and the phone service was fantastic.  I'd rank them right up there with Apple, which has thus far been my standard.  And you know what?  I'll gladly pay more for excellent customer service.  I think we all would.  Although we shouldn't have to.  Why not have a reasonable level of competence as your standard? I blame WalMart.

** I generally put books on hold at the library because I ALWAYS forget what I'm looking for when I'm there.  Because I have Book Alzheimer's.  Anyway, they'll do an automated call when your book is in.  The automated call is super annoying, because it sounds like a demented robot.  I found out from a friend that they'll send you an email notification instead, so since I'm all about checking fewer phone messages [how exhausting is it to have to push the button and listen and then delete?  I'm tired just thinking about it.] I decided to make the switch when I went to the library last time.

Where the old lady librarian gave me a hard time.  She told me no fewer than 4 times that they don't normally like to use that type of notification because people are constantly changing their email addresses.  Uh. What?  Really lady? Do I strike you as the type of person who is constantly changing her email address?  DO I LOOK LIKE A TEENAGER?  Just type it in, ok?

** Recent crazy time panic attacks:

~ Getting Albuterol up my nose when I accidentally snorted while inhaling it.  That was awesome.  Felt AMAZING.  And so I spent quite a bit of time on my good therapist Google making sure I wasn't the only who had done it and would not die from it.

~ Using Aveda Volumizer and then freaking! out! because it was new! and smelled different! and so then I had to rewash my hair because I was a loony.

** The other day, I was getting ready to shower and brushed my teeth.  I was rinsing with Listerine [Cool Blue] when I realized I needed something [a hair tie, nothing sexual, I was in a rush] from the bedroom.  So I decided I could just as easily swish Listerine in my mouth while I walked to the bedroom.

Where I turned on the light and then noticed a SPIDER!! Next to the light switch!! I spewed Listerine! In my room! And then, like a GENIUS, instead of running to the bathroom and spitting out what was left of the Listerine, I decided it was more important to KILL KILL KILL the spider! So I ran in and grabbed a tissue and squashed that fucking bug! BUT I DIDN'T!! I couldn't find the carcass!  It wasn't in the tissue and at that point, my mouth was REALLY starting to burn, so I just hoped I had mortally wounded the spider and got on with my day.  My room and my mouth smelled DELICIOUS.