Information Gathering

We've been getting the daily New York Times, which I like, because I like to have the news delivered to me in paper format so I can get ink on my fingers and do the crossword puzzle in ink and also maybe read something besides The Arts.  Except I read the paper every day for a week and it was too depressing:

Now THAT is a crime boss.

• Tunisia! [Wow - what the hell? People setting themselves ON FIRE to protest?  They must be beyond miserable.  And yes, it was a relatively bloodless turn over of power, but jeepers, what the hell?  Everyone's resigning?]
• Baby Doc Duvalier! [Oh, Haiti.  I can't even . . . so many atrocities.  I still can't believe people were CHEERING this monster's return.]
• Mob arrests! [I had no idea that there were that many mobsters still active.  Let's also have a moment of silence for my lover, Mr. John Gotti, the Teflon Don.]
• The banks want a piece of Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac! [Um, fuckers, isn't that how we got into this?]
• 25% of people still believe that vaccines cause autism. [That doctor who fabricated this information deserves a special place in hell.]

 So I've decided that I can't read that much news at once.  And by at once, I mean I can't handle all this bad news.  So I've decided to just go back to reading The Arts and maybe looking at the headlines but not reading the articles and doing my puzzle and getting all my news from Wonkette, because at least they will add the commentary that I so desperately need.