I had so many plans, so many thoughts so many reasons to not speak to friends and family while I was focusing on my work! My writing! My brilliance!
Which ended up being me, sitting and thinking, "Well, if I just look at this type of boot, maybe I'll find one I like," or "Sometimes watching multiple episodes of Psych is the best way to stimulate my creativity," or, more often than not, "Meh, I hate what I'm writing. Fuck this."
Writing is a bastard. Truly. It'll pull you in and sucker you into thinking that you can do this, it'll not only be cathartic but FUNSIES and so easy, you'll wonder why you aren't doing it ALL THE TIME.
You know why?
Because it's exhausting and sometimes really demoralizing.
But!
This year, instead of lamenting my sad word count, I've opted to focus on the positive:
- I've had the opportunity to chat with and email with some really good writers who are interested in what I'm doing and who I find interesting.
- I've written. Not as much as I'd hoped, but some, and that's better than nothing.
- I've had mini-epiphanies. Those are so great, and I can't discount how important it is to just learn, sometimes, and that the simple act of HAVING an idea is good enough.
- I've actually completed NaNoWriMo before, so I can complete it again. Not this year, but maybe next year. Why not? Just because I didn't finish this time doesn't mean I'll never finish.
- I can continue to work on my story and it'll be fine, whether it's done in January or May. November is a bullshit month anyway.
What about you? Did you write? Are you still writing? Are we still friends?
Sounds good!
ReplyDeleteMini-epiphanies are sorta like mini-orgasms - they might be tiny and quick, but they still are awesome.
Friends? Pssfftt... you're my sista from another mista.
We're still friends, and I did write and finish. I am TOTALLY in agreement with you about the demoralizing part. I had no idea my story was going to be so dark in places and there were days I wanted to crawl into bed and whisper "hold me" after I finished writing.
ReplyDeleteAnd then there's that whole - how do you know if it sucks aspect? That can be demoralizing too, n'est pas?
I've never finished NANOWRIMO. I blame it on the interweb.
ReplyDeleteOh yes, I've had those exact same feelings myself. So many plans for writing, yet somewhere around the 20k mark, a buh-zillion other things took priority.
ReplyDeleteYou still write, you still write about writing and that's the main thing. November is a shitty month. Ultimately, as long as you keep writing that's all that matters. Some people will finish NaNoWriMo in November and then not write anything until the next NaNoWriMo. They're the real losers - truefax...
I'm seriously impressed that you tried. I think I have a really great idea, but I'm too chicken shit to even start. As long as you didn't grow out your mustache in November, we can still be friends.
ReplyDeleteNo.
ReplyDeleteNot friends.
Because mental lovers should never turn to friends.
"How sad the love that turns to friendship."
Nope, sister, I plan on staying on fire for you pretty much for always.
Mini-epiphanies are way way better than mini-siezures but probably less exciting than mini-cupcakes.
ReplyDeleteAnd Psych rocks.
And you write during NaNoRiMo so I'd say that is a most definite win!
November went by in a flash! There's no way I could NaNoWriMo!! I have tried. There's. just. no. way. If I'm lucky, I'll finish the book I'm writing within the next year.
ReplyDeletei can never commit to this. i never know what my life's going to look like, and i hate letting myself down.
ReplyDeletethat being said, i NEED a huge writing project in my life. i need some freaking structure.
i purposely didn't write during the month of november... there's also camp nanowrimo, during july. i did that one and loved the experience.
ReplyDeleteI know myself well enough to know that NaNoWriMo is a no-no. The only nano I can handle is of the iPod variety.
ReplyDeleteNano is too much frigging pressure. I'll do NaMaWriMo with you next March. Or May. Whatever...as long as you're chugging along with the ideas and whatnot, it'll happen.
ReplyDeletep.s. Do the books written that month ever get published? I'm seriously curious...
I understand EXACTLY.
ReplyDeleteI still kick myself a little that I didn't fire up the NaNoWriMo mojo in time. I did however complete (with today's not-yet-posted post) NaBloPoMo. It was a real bitch but I did it. Wimpy by the NaNO standards, I know, but still ...
ReplyDeleteWhile I crossed the finish line this year, last year I flamed out at 29K. That experience helped me pace myself this year.
ReplyDeleteAt least you wrote and continued to do so.
November IS a bullshit month! That is why I only celebrate Mo-vember. No I cannot (yet) grow a moustache, but I can avoid the Lady with the hot wax yelling "Brazilians for everyone!"
ReplyDeleteWait.
ReplyDeleteThere's such a thing as a mini-orgasm?
Huh.
Oh, we are friends, whether you want me as a friend or not.
ReplyDeleteWriting is such a bitch, such an absolute bitch. This week, for me, it was watching the whole season of The Office I missed, on Hulu Plus. Why the hell did my husband subscribe to that shit? It is a writer's enemy, along with the rest of the internet.
NaNo is a beast. It is far too much pressure for a writer. Glad you're not hating yourself. It'll happen. Let the words come in their own time. Just don't subscribe to Hulu Plus. Trust me on this one.
I like this shift in your thinking. It's also something I'm working on, making friends with failure. I was oddly inspired by NaNoWriMo altho I am not writing a novel and have no plan to ever do so. But I wrote a lot. And it felt good.
ReplyDeleteYep we're still friends. Until Clooney calls.
ReplyDeleteWait- is November over? SHIT!
ReplyDeleteHey at least you tried and I give you credit for that. Lots and lots of credit. I have all the time in world and I've never even attempted to write every day for a month. Next time you'll get there.