You know how you are out in public and you hear stuff that you can't believe came out of someone's mouth, and you suddenly assume that you are being videotaped, because there is no way this is really happening?
I'd been taking the girl to physical therapy, and while she is there, this old man is also there getting who knows what done to his who knows where. Anyway, he talks non-stop from the time he walks in the door until he leaves. The girl and I have perfected the art of the WTF Face [her physical therapist kind of laughs softly and shakes his head, like he can't believe it either, because WE CANNOT BELIEVE OMFG WHY ISN'T THIS SOUNDPROOFED?]. Here are some of Old Man McTalky's gems:
"Koreans are a very proud people. They're the Jews of the Orient."
"I remember my grandpa sitting on his back porch. The heaviest thing he lifted was his pipe."
"I was married to her, but I couldn't leave her. She had mental problems. Like crazy people do."
[About some famous couple on a magazine he was looking at] "They're having a baby? And they're not married? Is that something to be proud of? I'm old school."
Here are some other things I've heard recently that have made me wonder why I have ears:
"Oh, come on, I agree with some of what Ron Paul has to say."
"Me? Oh, I sell Amway. Can I talk to you for a minute?"
"So I was hanging out with this couple, and then we started doing coke, and then they started to, you know, have sex with me, and I thought, 'Well, I guess so, I mean, what am I supposed to do?' I mean, they did give me coke."*
"Can I have some of your fries?"
"I don't read. I read a lot in school."
* This was actually from a number of years ago, but I still kind of . . . I mean WTF? Seriously? PS I personally have never done cocaine, as I have enough issues with my mind racing as it is, so maybe this is cocaine etiquette?
Now it's your turn. Statements that have made you question humanity?