Friday, December 27, 2013

Is front-boob now a thing?

So last night, my daughter, my aunt, my cousin, and I went to the movies, where we saw Amy Adams' breasticles flaunting themselves all over the giant screen. As we were sitting in the 3rd or 4th row to watch American Hustle [WTF, people, don't you have family to hang out with during the holidays? STAY HOME], the sight was perhaps more in our faces than for those in the back row, but still. Seriously.

I'm finding it more and more skeevy when women who are not being filmed in pornographic movies are dressed as if they are seconds and scraps of material from being in a pornographic movie.

I know, now I sound 1,000 years old and blah blah women can objectify themselves, and yes, I've been guilty of wearing a tiny outfit or two in my youth, but honest to fucking god, when everyone else [men] in the film is wearing a three piece suit AND a cravat, the women can at least have all of their boobs covered. I'm not requiring a turtleneck or even a crew neck sweater. Wear a v-neck! That's fine! Just make sure that it's not such a V that I spend the entire time wondering if Amy Adams' boob tape is going to hold.

Fully dressed men / scantily clad women does not have to be the default, even if your movie was set in the 1970s. WHICH I REMEMBER. AND WHICH HAD AMPLE MATERIAL, PARTICULARLY OF THE POLYESTER VARIETY.

So, David O. Russell, stop being so fucking gross.

[And don't even get me started on the whole age discrepancy thing. Ugh. I may need to stop reading Bitch magazine. Or I may need for everyone else to start.]

7 comments:

  1. I would be happy having any boob be a thing with me, but that's neither here nor there. While I haven't seen this latest cleavage caper as I haven't been to the theater in years, I will agree with you so I don't piss you off and say, "YES! Amy Adams, you are a talented actress. Tape down those girls when you can!"

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  2. I was wondering whether to go see American Hustle during the Christmas break.
    I have now made up my mind.
    Wonder if they're showing a matinee?

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  3. I've always been a bit burned that movies are pretty free and easy with full frontal for the ladies, and rarely produce such a sight with the men. Mind you, I'm not lying in wait for either one, but if you're going to serve up her goods, seems only fair he should have to as well. Whew! That was a little ranty. I'mma go ahead and let you take it from here.

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  4. I object to the objectification of women. However, were I to suddenly acquire frontal, side, bottom or even weirdly vertical boobage, I'd be objectifying the shit out of them because LOOK I HAVE BOOBS.

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  5. Amy Adams' breasts have had a child. I admired them for wanting to be shown.
    xo,
    Meredith
    badsandy.com

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  6. I keep waiting for full frontal male nudity to become popular. It's popular in my bedroom, though. So at least I have that going for me.

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  7. Yeah, David O Russell, if that's even your real name, stop being so gross. Happy New Year, Suniverse

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Every time you comment, I get a lady boner.