It's Too Hot to Make Sense.

Am I the only person who falls asleep on the toilet? Now, lest you think I'm on there forever, that is not the case.  Well, I'm going to the bathroom all the time, so it seems like I'm on there forever, but mainly it's a matter of quantity rather than duration.

For example, I'm usually up at least twice a night going to the bathroom - I don't sleep well, so when I wake up, I get up and go because I'm up anyway and I'd probably have to go and I need to do SOMETHING, because I'm awake, and I don't want to be obnoxious and turn on the t.v., even though my husband sleeps like the damned [or, as he says, with a clean conscience, same thing, right?] and wouldn't hear it and I can't find the book I lost in the bedcovers when I drifted off [unless it's a giant hardcover, then the odds are good it fell on my husband or is wedged underneath him - true story: I was reading one of the Harry Potter books (one of the later ones, a big one) and I fell asleep while holding it and it somehow got wedged under my husband's back and he had a sore back for 2 days] where was I? OH! - so occasionally I'll be so tired that I'll get up, go to the bathroom, pee and I'll hit a wall of drowsiness and doze off, only to wake up sometimes 20 minutes later, still on the toilet wondering what the hell is going on and enjoying the imprint of the toilet seat on my person. 

Just wondering if I'm the only one. 

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I'm also wondering if I'm the only person with a laptop who DOES NOT take it into the bathroom with her. Because that is just so weird. And gross. And disgusting. Read a magazine - you'll save someone's job, and avoid germing up office equipment.  Even if it is your own personal home computer.  I mean someone, at some point, is going to touch it besides you, right?  Be kind.

[As a parenthetical - is there anything grosser than being at work and seeing someone come out of the bathroom with a file or packet of paperwork?  I don't care how much you protest that you just popped in on your way to do something else and set it on the counter, that's nasty.]

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I'm doing laundry [I know! Can you believe it?] and I tossed in the swimming stuff from the weekend and I saw a spider crawling around on one of the towels after I put it in the washer and I thought, "I should do something about that," but I was certainly not going to touch it, so I closed the lid and let the water, soap and agitator do its work.  I also did a second rinse because I don't want spider parts in my bathing suit.  Evidently my laundry room has become a haven for spiders. You'd think the cats would do something about it. You'd be mistaken.

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Fucking Twitter is being a bullshit fucking cock and not letting me one because I've exceeded my magical mystical requests or some bullshit something or other when CLEARLY I did not because I was UNABLE to get on the fucking Twitter for like 9 hours.  I didn't think I'd ever care about that, but there it is.  There it is.

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It's 8billion degrees here this week. I hate the heat with a bitter, cold fury. If the two connected, I'd cause a thunderstorm.  That would be fucking awesome.