Thursday, December 9, 2010


* Who would win in a fight? My daughter after three karate lessons, or me, after a lifetime of repressed [and not so repressed] anger?

* The husband loves puns.  I do not.  The girl thinks the husband is hilarious, as when he uttered this gem, "Call of Duty?  I feel a Call of Doodie coming on."  Yet when I initially laughed at the word Duty/Doodie, I was reviled as having a pedestrian sense of humor.

* My brother-in-law and his wife are coming in to town on Friday for the weekend.  I like this set of in-laws.  I do not like the fact that I have to clean my house.  Which kind of makes me angry at them, thanks to the transitive property.  If A = B and B = C, then A = C.  Where A is Hatred; B is Cleaning the House; and C is Brother-in-law & Wife.  I have mad math skillz, baby.

* I somehow, one day earlier this week, strained/sprained my forefinger.  I thought it would get better, but this morning I woke up with Raptor Claw:
That's what my hand looked like this morning.  I also walk around like this in the morning.  Except, you know, with longish curly hair.  If I had any photoshop skills whatsoever, I'd add a big fat giant blob of hair to this picture.  Let's use our imaginations and pretend I did.  Wow.  This is getting ridiculously long, isn't it?
* Oh, yeah, so my point was that I woke up with Raptor Claw and was harassed into making a dr. appointment because I not only couldn't bend my fingers, I was being a martyr like my own mother.  Like all mothers.  I figured it would get better on its own.  [It hasn't.]

* People in Detroit stole an ambulance.  While it was on call.  Yes:  While the paramedics were in taking care of someone, jackasses stole the ambulance waiting outside.  That doesn't really relate to family, except seriously?  Who raised them?


  1. I did that to my finger once & was told I had "stoved" it... I think that's some country phrase I'd never heard before but I just thought I'd share it with you :)

  2. I have raptor claw every morning. Should I be worried? Also I don't have a Doctor... The same question applies.

    Also, you have mad maths skillz!

    ALSO! I've missed you lots.

  3. oh yeah - i'm a big practitioner of the transitive property of angry. this sometimes gets me into trouble...

  4. * you
    * give puns a chance
    * A + B - C = happiness
    * nice
    * go to the doctor
    * don't call for an ambulance

  5. KJ - I will, from now on, use "stoved" when describing any injury like the one to my finger. That is genius.

    Jo - it's like we're twins. Honestly. Don't be worried. My doctor said I pulled a tendon. Or it could be rheumetoid arthritis. But probably a tendon thing. MISS YOU.

    Magnolia - I <3 you! Math skills are awesome, no matter the result.

    Simone Says - Thanks for picking me as the winner. I'll be sure to acknowledge you in my victory speech. And I like your math even better than mine.

  6. Dang...ate my comment.

    What did I say?

    Oh,yeah, I have the same math skills...hate cleaning the house. Love the company.

  7. Ah yes...the "duty" joke. Apparently our spouses have the same sense of humor.

    It would be awesome if you woke up a raptor one day but only if you harnessed this power for good and headed to Sarah Palin Alaska where you quickly devoured her whole family, starting with her, of course. Perhaps even though you only have the claw you can still do this? That'd be fabulous! I'd owe you one!

  8. I don't understand math at all, but that equation makes perfect sense to me.


Every time you comment, I get a lady boner.