Dear Young Teen Age Boy,
Do I look like The Incredible Hulk to you?
I only ask, because while my skin does have an olive tone, I do not possess the sheer muscle mass required to lift and carry a bag filled with 3 whole tenderloins or the other bag filled to near bursting with 3 five pound bags of flour [King Arthur is on sale, everyone! LET THE BAKING BEGIN!]. I mean, I know this coat is kind of bulky, and I'm not at my binge drinking college weight anymore, but I kind of figured that my being 5'2" tall and the lack of weightlifting medals on my chest would clue you in that my arms are not made of steel.
I know that when you asked, "Paper or plastic?" I answered, "I have some bags here." What I did not know was that you would assume I wanted my entire overflowing holiday extravaganza shopping cart crammed into the 6 tote bags I brought with me. I have to applaud your Tetris-style skills at organizing every canned good I purchased on the bottom of one bag, and then layering the 10 bags of various chocolate chips on top.
Thanks, too, for not crushing the several bags of chips. The husband and the girl could not be happier to be eating fully formed potato products, and I at least had one bag that I was capable of lifting.
Anyway, go back to your flirting with the girl bagger. You two make a cute couple. She's way more into you than she is the guy she was talking about.