I have to admit, I harbor an affection for trashy blond pop stars.
I'm not sure what that says about me - I am not blond [any more], nor am I a pop star, and my trashy days are behind me [Man, I miss being drunk and slutty. How is this not acceptable at work? WTF? SOCIALISM! IT'S A PLOT TO KEEP THE WORKING WOMAN DOWN!], so it's not as if I identify with them.
Except for the fact that I've made ridiculous choices and horrific errors in judgment. Who hasn't? [If you haven't, I don't think we can be friends. What are we going to talk about when you come over for dinner? How awesome you were at your yearly mammogram? BORING. I need dirt on your youthful misdeeds or at least I need you to tell me about how you kept trying to make jokes with the technician, telling her that your husband/significant other doesn't play with your boobs this good, until she leaves and makes someone else come in for the rest of the exam.] [My mammogram is coming up next week. I'll be sure to keep you posted!]
Anyway, I find Ke$ha, Jessica Simpson and Britney Spears all quite charming. Sure, they may not make the best choices, but they seem good-hearted. They aren't malicious, nor are they industrial polluters, and they didn't break the economy, so I think the fact that one of them has a vag that makes grown men unable to win sporting events is really not that big a deal. Actually, it is a big deal, because I find that AWESOME.
Ke$ha reminds me of me when I would go out drinking and dancing. We actually share a similar sense of style.
Britney seems like the slightly goofy younger friend that you have to keep an eye one, or she'll give your cab money to the first semi-homeless guy who asks.
And Jessica Simpson designs surprisingly cute shoes. The girl and I are CONSTANTLY surprised. We'll see a pair of shoes, go, "Wow, these are cute!" and then TA DA - Jessica Simpson.
So, there it is. I love trashy blond pop stars. Judge me if you must, but remember this:
Yeah. I've got nothing.
Now give - who is your shameful crush?