Friday, May 20, 2011

Week in Review - Guys Are Assholes

God, guys are fucking pigs, aren't they?   This whole week has just been one douchebag after another being outed for being an asshole.

Arnold is a baby daddy.  Gosh, who'd have thought that this guy, with a history of inappropriate behavior and assaulting women, would be such a fucking tool as to bang his family's housekeeper [am I the only one thinking of Mike Brady and Alice?] and have a kid born within days of his own? And that he only copped to it after his wife confronted the housekeeper? And also only after finishing out his term as governor?  My only surprise was that, as a Republican, he had adulterous sex with a woman.
I find this threesome markedly less skeevy than Arnold's self-involved fuckery.  Yes, even though Mike Brady was gay.  Source.
And speaking of self-entitled douchebags, the now-former IMF chief decided his trip to New York wasn't complete without a little sexual assault.  Another fucking tool with a history of assaulting women and completely inappropriate behavior.  Do you think he and Arnold are congratulating each other for their timing so that the media focus isn't solely on one or the other?  I kind of think they are.

Newt Gingrich implodes.  And I, for one, can't think of another person who deserves it more.  This sanctimonious prick, who, as I cannot stress enough, ASKED HIS WIFE FOR A DIVORCE WHILE SHE WAS RECEIVING TREATMENT FOR CANCER, evidently started shit-talking his own party's hardline attempts to dismantle Medicare which led to many a potential backer stepping far, far away from his purse-lipped melon head.  Dude, you lost your relevance when people stopped caring about presidential blowjobs.  And again, I can't stress enough, that this fucking hypocrite was getting his with a mistress while piously lamenting Clinton's ethical lapses.  Suck it hard, Gingrich.

In more hopeful news for the future of our planet, the CDC put out a zombie apocalypse survival guide which was so awesome that it crashed their server.  I LOVE whoever put this idea together and want to French kiss the person who o.k.'d it.  This? Is why people should go into public service.

What are you planning on wearing for the Rapture?  I'm thinking a feather boa.

26 comments:

  1. They really don't think before they do. What the fuck happened to "With great power comes great responsibility" Shee-it. People need to listen to Spiderman more.

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  2. I want to put piles of clothes all around town and start screaming IT'S HAPPENING! as people walk by. I'm going to hell. The end.

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  3. All these guys just wanted to self-destruct. Fucking hypocrites!

    Couldn't have happened to a better bunch of douche-bags...

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  4. I just want to point out Republician, Democrat, or French, there are some guys who get into power and think they are immune from laws and immorality. I call it the ASSHOLE SYNDROME and such a lot of it in the corporate environment.

    And I'm pretty sure Alice was safe, seeing that Mike Brady was actually gay.

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  5. btw...that 'SUCH' in my paragraph above should be SAW. I didn't proof my comment because I was L-A-Z-Y.

    Have a great weekend!!!!!!

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  6. AND don't forget less than oh, let's say 7 business days, Trump dropped out of a political candidacy race he never should have even mentioned, unless he was cutting checks. to me. cutting checks to me. yes.

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  7. LOL...Newt Gingrich is still alive, he must be like 112 by now, to have a mistress I imagine there is a popsicle stick and scotch tape.....and lots of scotch (for her) involved.

    And as far as what I'm wearing to The Rapture, since I figure I'm going to hell, I'm wearing fire.

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  8. Oh yeah and Alice was gay too. That would have been a great scandal if it actually happened.

    Yeah men and apocolypses bite, huh!?!?

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  9. The mistresses of these men (Tiger, John Edwards, Jesse James, Arnold - you know the never ending list) prove that it's not about looks, just about sex. Guys will sleep with anything. Which one had the hookers aside from Tiger? Oh wasn't it, um, Spitzer? Anyway even when they have gorgeous women (Tony Parker, Kobe Bryant) at home they still seek out some place to stick it.

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  10. What are you planning on wearing for the Rapture?

    Nothing but socks and a shit-eating grin.

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  11. I always liked that douche Arnold. After Kindergarten Cop I was convinced that he was just as lovable in real life. Seriously--what a tool.

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  12. I'm so disappointed in myself for ALWAYS being shocked and dismayed when actors who seem noble and admirable (hello, they're ACTORS) turn out to be douchebuckets of the highest order. I'm still recovering from the David Boreanaz fallout (but he was a vampire with a SOUL! His name was ANGEL!) Sometimes it's so embarrassing to be me.

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  13. powerful boys are so icky, aren't they? seriously.

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  14. "Purse-lipped melon head" is my new favorite expression.

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  15. Which is why in post zombie apocalypse world, the men will be our slaves and there only to serve us..... or at least thats what I'm banking on

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  16. Ah-nold is SUCH a dick. And maybe the CDC knows something we don't ... I will be more careful now.

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  17. I put the seat down all the time.
    Still....sorry.

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  18. I still don't get why a beautiful, intelligent woman like Maria would marry him, even when she had to keep defending Arnold to her dad and family.

    They all hated the douche.

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  19. Ditto, ditto and ditto.

    And I wore nothing for rapture. And didn't get raptured, yo. At least I didn't waste any effort.

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  20. I didn't think it was possible to love you more, but.

    "My only surprise was that, as a Republican, he had adulterous sex with a woman."

    Yep. That line right there was rapture all by itself.

    Me? I'm going wine tasting. Zombies seem more like a whiskey crowd so fingers crossed...

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  21. Man I'm glad I live down here in the colony where shit like this never happens. Ha. Haha. Ha.

    Who the fuck is Newt Thingo and who the fuck calls their kid 'Newt'???

    Also. I know I've said it before, but we are really really sorry about Mel. Thank you for taking him in for all these years. We really appreciate it.

    Sarah xxx

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  22. Guys are totally assholes. But women aren't much better. Everyone sucks, basically. Except you and me.

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  23. Bravo. I couldn't have said any of this better myself. (Why is everyone worried about a zombie apocalypse?)

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  24. Yeah, it's pretty bad here too. The words 'Twitter' and 'Super-injunction' are the only ones they use on the news these days.

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  25. Hey - I resemble that asshole comment!

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  26. I'm loving the week in review. Seriously. I have NEVER been a fan of the Arnold. He has been a douche bag ever since he donned a speedo, spray tanned and lifted a dumb-bell.

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Every time you comment, I get a lady boner.