Thursday, March 8, 2012

Are you kidding me?

This abomination was on my calendar on Wednesday. I ended up tearing it off and technically skipping March 7th because of it.


Way to fuck up my day, stupid calendar.

My mother-in-law gave me this calendar. Why does she hate me?

22 comments:

  1. for a thousand dollars!!! I hope you got the thousand at least.

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  2. Hahahah love for your caption for it.

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  3. I'll take "People who are still bitter about GOOP and everything it represents" for $1000, Alex.

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  4. Just for that I think I'd skip March 8th too.

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  5. You should retaliate by giving her a fireman's shirtless calendar...oh wait...

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  6. This is an abomination. I think the entire calendar should be burned as a result. There are no more days. The end.

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  7. Clearly that calendar is possessed and needs to be thrown into flames, preferably one that begins with G.P. getting setting on fire.

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  8. hahahhahahhaahahahah!

    the more we resist, the more it persists...

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  9. hahaha, what kind of question is that? Certainly not one they'd ask on the actual show.

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  10. Hey listen. She has some good qualities. Like her cookbook! Her recipe for chocolate chip cookies comes from the back of a bag of Nestle, except instead of Nestle chips, she uses gold. And instead of salt, she uses the tears of sad billionaires.

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  11. When Jeopardy recognizes you for what you named your children rather than what roles you've played, you don't get to be called "actress" any more.

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  12. When this kind of crap comes up, just remember, she wore a damn CAPE to the Oscars, and made an utter ass of herself.

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  13. She will RUE THE DAY she ruined your day. (Actually, there's two she's in question, and I'm not sure whose worse.)

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    Replies
    1. WHO'S. Look what they made me do. DAY RUINED. AND RUED.

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  14. I can't wait to read about your plot to get back at the MIL...does it involve Josh Grobin?

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  15. Since March 7th is my mom's birthday I can't skip iit, but I share your disgust at her sharing a day with my saintly mom ;).

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  16. "Why does she hate me?" Ha!

    Around here are line is "Why are you killing me?"

    You know. Like when I ask my husband, "Did you know you got fat-free cottage cheese?"

    (Picture me using my sweet voice, by the way. Because duh.)

    Anyway, you'd be surprised how often we have to say it.
    (Or maybe you wouldn't.)

    I bet Moses' mom never accidentally buys fat-free cottage cheese.

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  17. Gwyneth Paltrow sucks rocks. That is all.

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  18. This really played a mind game with me! First, I was annoyed at myself for being so out-of-the-loop that I never even knew she had a son named Moses. Then I felt annoyed at myself that I even cared about being out-of-the-loop! Finally, I just ended up hating the entire stupid thing.

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  19. This reminds me that celebrities are ultimately stupid.

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Every time you comment, I get a lady boner.