Looky what we did, PRANKSTERS:
|Oh, yes we did!|
You may know how I feel about a certain someone. A certain someone who . . . well, let's just say is kind of GOOP-y.
|NOT Gwyneth K. Paltrow's GOOP. This one serves a purpose.|
Gwyneth K. Paltrow, as you may be aware is not only the daughter of Blythe Danner and Bruce Paltrow, but also an Oscar-winning actress [for Shakespeare in Love] [on par with Marisa Tomei's Oscar, in my opinion], wife of that guy from Coldplay, mother to Apple and Moses [oh, come on. Really?], and the purveyor of the website GOOP.
Oh, Gwyneth K. Paltrow - Oh, you and Goop.
Your silly, silly online magazine/newsletter. Your self-involved regurgitation of empty-headed silliness.
I've written about you before. I still don't like you.
Other people have written about you, Gwyneth K. Paltrow, you and your cleanses and BE. How insane is it to try and survive on basically water?
Gwyneth K. Paltrow, you think of things and then spew them, and most of the time, it sounds like idiocy.
|Read a book, Gwyneth K. Paltrow. Read a book and stop talking.|
Gwyneth K. Paltrow, you are a proponent of being gluten-free, but I don't think you are allergic to gluten.
Gwyneth K. Paltrow, you and your BFF Madonna are silly. I have zero patience for people who air their fueds in public and online [oh! WAIT! THE HYPOCRISY!]
Gwyneth K. Paltrow, you have no concept of reality. I mean, I guess you shouldn't, because you are the child of pretty famous actors, so your life is pretty privileged. Can't you just admit that? Can't you, Gwyneth K. Paltrow? Own your privilege. You cannot relate to the rest of us.
Gwyneth K. Paltrow, you are ridiculous.
|Alexander McQueen's biggest mistake.|
Gwyneth Paltrow, you have been John C. Mayer'd.