Hello, lovelies.
I hope you enjoyed hearing from the Husband yesterday. He had fun writing & LOVES the comments. I've wrested control of my blog back, but haven't kept up on the news, so I'm giving you a Pop Quiz! No studying needed, just answer when ready!
Would you rather ...
Lick a frog or a snake?
Eat a spoonful of mayonnaise or butter?
Wear jeans or pants or a skirt?
Spend 5 minutes in 120 degree heat or 0 degree cold (sorry, Celsius users, I've got nothing)?
Get caught shoplifting or urinating in public?
Spill something on your brand new sofa or watch someone else spill something on it?
Ride a rollercoaster or a giant Ferris wheel?
Eat a salty snack or a sweet snack?
Well, don't just sit there. Quiz starts NOW!
XO,
Suniverse
Friday, July 29, 2011
Thursday, July 28, 2011
The Husband on Thursday - It Begins
As noted, the Husband has graciously agreed to post on Thursdays for me. I am a little mad because this is far too fucking funny, but I'll refrain from stealing it and saying I wrote it and just let you enjoy:
A guest blog appearance on the Suniverse – dreams really do come true! My first inclination was to actually read her blog but I caught myself and said, “Generalissimo, WWGD? What would Gwyneth do?” Naturally, Gwyneth wouldn’t bother to acquire an expertise about a subject before spouting off on the internet about it to all of her sycophantic fans, and neither shall I.
Now for some of that behind the scenes dope I’m sure you’re all expecting me to dish. While it’s common knowledge that the Suniverse is infatuated with Tina Fey and her NBC sitcom, referred to at home as 30 Crack Rock, what isn’t so apparent is the reason(s) behind said attraction. Allow me to drop some science, 30 Rock is a parallel Suniverse.
Very obviously, Tina Fey’s character, Liz Lemon, represents our heroine the Suniverse. She is smart, clever, funny, pretty, and emotionally unbalanced. She is perpetually starving, tired, and undersexed. Besides being the only person capable of running the “show”, she finds herself to be the only one willing to sacrifice her own personal needs and desires for the good of the “show”.
Let’s examine the cast of characters as they apply to the Suniverse’ real life staff.
Pete Hornberger – representing the “Husband”. He is the Suniverse’ biggest supporter amongst the staff (mostly because he doesn’t want to do the heavy lifting himself) and an accurate representation of the Suniverse’ perception of how her “Husband” feels about family life. ("Because sometimes it feels like too much and maybe Daddy just needs to get in the car and drive." – Pete Hornberger)
Kenneth Parcell – represents the Husband’s hillbilly family and bad British teeth. (My parents told me that the orthodontist said they would straighten out when my jaw grew; it never did).
Tracy Jordan – represents the Husband’s celebrity-like self-indulgence and willful obliviousness to people and things going around him, as well as the stay up/out all night attitude that he should have stopped some15 years ago.
Frank Rossitano – the Husband’s frat-boy sexual deviance.
Toofer – the inverse representation of the Husband’s suburban white-guy love of all things Gangsta and subsequent ridiculousness.
JD Lutz – the Husband’s dopey white-guy love of fantasy sports, video games, Joseph Conrad novels, and dark, depressing movies.
Jenna Maroney – the Girl’s self-absorption and histrionic/narcissitic personality disorders - not to mention her propensity for idea larceny.
Cerie – represents the Girl as the hip, young, tech-savvy beauty that has her whole life ahead of her. A constant reminder of the Suniverse’ misspent youth.
Jack Donaghy – this one took a moment. I mean who in the Suniverse’ world is that charismatic, seductive, powerful, and sophisticated. Who does the Suniverse turn to as a friend, mentor, role model, or voice of reason? And then it dawned on me, it’s all of you.
So I thank you, Internets. For being there when the Girl and I sat waiting for hours for the Suniverse to join us for an episode of Lost, or causing her to lose track of time and subsequently burn the beejeezus out of the chicken, again. And lest I forget, thanks for all those wonderful moments when she looks up at me from the computer and says, “What are you talking about?”
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Oh, yeah, THAT'S what work is like (It kind of sucks)
First, I want to thank the lovely and talented Karensomethingorother for doing such an excellent job as the inaugural Guest Poster. I'm also bitter and sad about Amy Winehouse dying, and full of loathing for Katy Perry, and hell, yes, those shades have to be drawn and . . . well, this is devolving.
Anyway, thanks so much and tune in next Tuesday for the next mystery Guest Poster. And tomorrow for the husband. He better have written something, or there will be blood.
I'm back at work, and it's not terrible. There is a learning curve, of course, because there are things that you forget when you've been out of work for almost 4 months, such as:
Giddy anticipation of your paycheck. I've been sitting at my desk, working, when I'll suddenly be seized by the need to know HOW MUCH MONEY I will be making if I work, say, 50 hours this week. And so I start tabulating and then I start thinking, well, why don't I work 54 hours, and then I think, well, why not 60 hours and then I punch myself in the head and dial it down. Because I am not working 60 hours this week. No matter how many shiny $$$ it will bring me.
That incessant chatter that you CANNOT CLICK AWAY FROM. I mentioned this on Twitter [because I am tired and so am recycling material, and also because maybe you don't follow me on Twitter and you missed this, and if you don't follow me, why not? I am fucking delightful.] and that lead to this:
Yes, you have to read it bottom up, but wouldn't it be wonderful if work was run like Twitter? WOULDN'T IT?
I also commandeered a good desk chair. Because I would totally do that on Twitter.
People do not understand / adhere to dress codes. Where I work it is all professionals, and I say this not because we are some fabulous elite, but because we are supposed to be PROFESSIONALS [no, not the hooker kind and not the Jean Reno kind, either.]
and we have a professional dress code, which clearly states NO OPEN TOED SHOES for women [I guess that thankfully goes without saying for the men] and so I am wearing closed toed shoes. And I am pretty much the only one because everyone else? Is wearing fucking flip flops. Please, ladies, please, let this trend/fad/abomination die its rightful death. Flip flops are for pools and public showers. Buy a nice pair of flat sandals. You'll look so much better. [PS Tomorrow I am being a daredevil and wearing sandals. WOOHOO!]
It is pretty near impossible to comfortably read a blog on my iPhone. And so I am woefully even further behind on my blog reading. But know that I love you, truly, with all my heart and cannot WAIT until I win that fucking lottery.
Anyone have any lucky numbers?
I MISS YOU ALL.
XOXOXOXOXO
Anyway, thanks so much and tune in next Tuesday for the next mystery Guest Poster. And tomorrow for the husband. He better have written something, or there will be blood.
I'm back at work, and it's not terrible. There is a learning curve, of course, because there are things that you forget when you've been out of work for almost 4 months, such as:
Giddy anticipation of your paycheck. I've been sitting at my desk, working, when I'll suddenly be seized by the need to know HOW MUCH MONEY I will be making if I work, say, 50 hours this week. And so I start tabulating and then I start thinking, well, why don't I work 54 hours, and then I think, well, why not 60 hours and then I punch myself in the head and dial it down. Because I am not working 60 hours this week. No matter how many shiny $$$ it will bring me.
That incessant chatter that you CANNOT CLICK AWAY FROM. I mentioned this on Twitter [because I am tired and so am recycling material, and also because maybe you don't follow me on Twitter and you missed this, and if you don't follow me, why not? I am fucking delightful.] and that lead to this:
I also commandeered a good desk chair. Because I would totally do that on Twitter.
People do not understand / adhere to dress codes. Where I work it is all professionals, and I say this not because we are some fabulous elite, but because we are supposed to be PROFESSIONALS [no, not the hooker kind and not the Jean Reno kind, either.]
 |
| Although that would make for an interesting workplace. |
It is pretty near impossible to comfortably read a blog on my iPhone. And so I am woefully even further behind on my blog reading. But know that I love you, truly, with all my heart and cannot WAIT until I win that fucking lottery.
Anyone have any lucky numbers?
I MISS YOU ALL.
XOXOXOXOXO
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
GUEST POST: I’m So Mad At Amy Winehouse
As I've noted, Tuesdays are going to be a day for my wonderful blogging friends to use this space to let loose. There are no rules, not even that one rule about not talking about Fight Club.
First up is the ever-lovely Karensomethingorother. She writes at Ow, my angst, and is clever and witty and scathingly funny. These are a few of my favorite things.
Karensomethingorother is Canadian, which automatically makes her awesome, and she has a delightful view on things, such as the horrors of summer with children and her guilty pleasure and how awesome her daughter is and why she has such a twisted view of cherries.
Karensomethingorother graciously offered to be a guest poster in order to get this off her chest:
I'm So Mad at Amy Winehouse
I’m actually typing this in Word right now, instead of the much preferred blog editor, and that stupid Paper Clip guy just popped up. You know who the paper clip guy is: that idiot ass cartoon character who is supposed to be helpful when you have to ask a question like “how do I shut off AUTO CORRECT,” or “HOW DO I TYPE A GODDAMN LABEL FOR AN ENVELOPE? I USED TO HAVE A REAL JOB, AND I TYPED LABELS ALL THE TIME BUT NOW I’M A STAY-AT-HOME RETARD”.
So, that paper clip guy is kinda helpful, but then he just turns into “your anal friend who won’t get out of your business and can not seem to stop giving unsolicited advice.”
Annoying.
Anyhow, today should have been perfect. My two kids have gone off to their grandparents’ for a sleepover, where they can eat chocolate sweeties until they get tummy-tum aches, watch as many child-friendly videos as they like, and forget all about that awful word “NO” for an entire day. I’m happy because this means they can head-butt each other at someone else’s house.
So, that sounds right-on, right? Maybe I’d have mowed my lady lawn, mixed up some cocktails and forgotten that The Man keeps leaving his sweaty, mildew factory karate clothes in the laundry basket every. single. week. instead of taking a f*cking minute to hang them up on the line until they dry the eff out. And after some terrifying afternoon delight (terrifying because it would be in DAYLIGHT, and this party doesn’t roll these days unless it’s too black to see anything) we’d head off to the movie theatre to see THE LAST HARRY POTTER, YO! BOO YAH!
But no. I have wicked bad cramps, and I have to go out and look for tampons that are nearly as wide as a roll of paper towels, and fork over six bucks to the library for an over-due Wiggles dvd. I’m just waiting for the two aspirin to kick in.
In the meantime, I come to my friend Internet, to pass the time until said NSAIDS kick in, and see that Amy Winehouse has died. And stupid me? I’M SHOCKED.
How the hell am I shocked when her death is elementary, my dear Watson? But damn, she had a good voice, and damn, she had a cool vibe, and damn, that was one good album, and goddamnit, but that idiot Katy Perry will still be cranking out the crap forever, and when they stick the microphone in front of a group of young girls, and ask them who their favourite artists are, they’ll all cheep “ohmygod we LOVE Katy Perry!!!” And sadly, fantastic songs like “Back To Black,” will be overshadowed by whipped cream titty guns, and skin so hot it’ll melt yer popsicle, SQUEEEEEK!
Yeah, what a bummer.
First up is the ever-lovely Karensomethingorother. She writes at Ow, my angst, and is clever and witty and scathingly funny. These are a few of my favorite things.
Karensomethingorother is Canadian, which automatically makes her awesome, and she has a delightful view on things, such as the horrors of summer with children and her guilty pleasure and how awesome her daughter is and why she has such a twisted view of cherries.
Karensomethingorother graciously offered to be a guest poster in order to get this off her chest:
I'm So Mad at Amy Winehouse
I’m actually typing this in Word right now, instead of the much preferred blog editor, and that stupid Paper Clip guy just popped up. You know who the paper clip guy is: that idiot ass cartoon character who is supposed to be helpful when you have to ask a question like “how do I shut off AUTO CORRECT,” or “HOW DO I TYPE A GODDAMN LABEL FOR AN ENVELOPE? I USED TO HAVE A REAL JOB, AND I TYPED LABELS ALL THE TIME BUT NOW I’M A STAY-AT-HOME RETARD”.
So, that paper clip guy is kinda helpful, but then he just turns into “your anal friend who won’t get out of your business and can not seem to stop giving unsolicited advice.”
Annoying.
Anyhow, today should have been perfect. My two kids have gone off to their grandparents’ for a sleepover, where they can eat chocolate sweeties until they get tummy-tum aches, watch as many child-friendly videos as they like, and forget all about that awful word “NO” for an entire day. I’m happy because this means they can head-butt each other at someone else’s house.
So, that sounds right-on, right? Maybe I’d have mowed my lady lawn, mixed up some cocktails and forgotten that The Man keeps leaving his sweaty, mildew factory karate clothes in the laundry basket every. single. week. instead of taking a f*cking minute to hang them up on the line until they dry the eff out. And after some terrifying afternoon delight (terrifying because it would be in DAYLIGHT, and this party doesn’t roll these days unless it’s too black to see anything) we’d head off to the movie theatre to see THE LAST HARRY POTTER, YO! BOO YAH!
But no. I have wicked bad cramps, and I have to go out and look for tampons that are nearly as wide as a roll of paper towels, and fork over six bucks to the library for an over-due Wiggles dvd. I’m just waiting for the two aspirin to kick in.
In the meantime, I come to my friend Internet, to pass the time until said NSAIDS kick in, and see that Amy Winehouse has died. And stupid me? I’M SHOCKED.
How the hell am I shocked when her death is elementary, my dear Watson? But damn, she had a good voice, and damn, she had a cool vibe, and damn, that was one good album, and goddamnit, but that idiot Katy Perry will still be cranking out the crap forever, and when they stick the microphone in front of a group of young girls, and ask them who their favourite artists are, they’ll all cheep “ohmygod we LOVE Katy Perry!!!” And sadly, fantastic songs like “Back To Black,” will be overshadowed by whipped cream titty guns, and skin so hot it’ll melt yer popsicle, SQUEEEEEK!
Yeah, what a bummer.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Wearing a black armband in memory of funemployment.
Well, I'm back at work. I am thrilled to be gainfully employed and sad that my summer vacation ended so abruptly. And mad that I didn't have the funds to enjoy my hiatus. And happy that I'll be productive. And a little thirsty because it's still so fucking hot.
Speaking of gainful employment - I'm back to the hellish commute, so do you have any audio book recommendations? I like mysteries, but nothing too scary or aggravating, since I'm already going to be throw down-ready while driving. I also like FUNNY books, but make sure they are funny haha not funny I'm going to kill someone if this slow-witted idiot doesn't end it soon. Yes, Confederacy of Dunces, I'm talking to you. I've already listened to Bossypants 3 1/2 times in a row, and I just got the hardcover, so I'm feeling like I should branch out.
************
Anytime anyone has asked me if I've seen Secretariat [and this has happened a surprising number of times - evidently I'm someone who comes across as horesy. I said HORSEY, not WHOREY. Gah, people, come on. I gave that up a long time ago. Just ask the husband. Which you can, on Thursdays.], I always say yes. Except I just realized I haven't. I actually saw Seabiscuit. I would argue that they are the same movie.
************
Guys need to wear shirts while working out. And riding bikes. And walking down the street. I don't care how awesome you think your bod is, no one wants to see that in the daylight. [Mostly because it is never as awesome as you think it is.] While I am all about body acceptance, I am more about equality, and until I can walk around in the heat, shirtless, and not have it be a big fucking deal, no one gets to.
************
We have been very lucky for pretty much the entire time we've lived in this house in that we've had good neighbors. Not best buds, or anything, but good neighbors we can chat with and get together with and who aren't assholes. Until last January, when the neighbors across the street moved and couldn't sell their house and so they are now renting it to the most fucking white trash pieces of shit in the history of shitty neighbors.
There must be between 4 and 8 people living in that house at any given time, and there are shitty cars parked on the street and the guy has some sort of business where he rents trucks - the latest from Penske, so Penske, if you're reading this, you need to clean house on the people you rent your trucks to - and he parks them in front of his house until the business at the end of the street closes at which point he illegally parks in their lot.
I hate him and all his trashy family with the heat of a thousand suns, and so does my neighbor, so we spend a lot of time texting each other when we see them do something stupid so that we can call the city.
Have you ever had a shitty neighbor? Do pitchforks and torches work?
************
Don't forget - it's the Raw Photos contest this week. Andygirl and I can't wait to see what you've got. Submit your best PEOPLE pictures so that we can judge you. In a loving way.
Speaking of gainful employment - I'm back to the hellish commute, so do you have any audio book recommendations? I like mysteries, but nothing too scary or aggravating, since I'm already going to be throw down-ready while driving. I also like FUNNY books, but make sure they are funny haha not funny I'm going to kill someone if this slow-witted idiot doesn't end it soon. Yes, Confederacy of Dunces, I'm talking to you. I've already listened to Bossypants 3 1/2 times in a row, and I just got the hardcover, so I'm feeling like I should branch out.
************
Anytime anyone has asked me if I've seen Secretariat [and this has happened a surprising number of times - evidently I'm someone who comes across as horesy. I said HORSEY, not WHOREY. Gah, people, come on. I gave that up a long time ago. Just ask the husband. Which you can, on Thursdays.], I always say yes. Except I just realized I haven't. I actually saw Seabiscuit. I would argue that they are the same movie.
************
Guys need to wear shirts while working out. And riding bikes. And walking down the street. I don't care how awesome you think your bod is, no one wants to see that in the daylight. [Mostly because it is never as awesome as you think it is.] While I am all about body acceptance, I am more about equality, and until I can walk around in the heat, shirtless, and not have it be a big fucking deal, no one gets to.
************
We have been very lucky for pretty much the entire time we've lived in this house in that we've had good neighbors. Not best buds, or anything, but good neighbors we can chat with and get together with and who aren't assholes. Until last January, when the neighbors across the street moved and couldn't sell their house and so they are now renting it to the most fucking white trash pieces of shit in the history of shitty neighbors.
There must be between 4 and 8 people living in that house at any given time, and there are shitty cars parked on the street and the guy has some sort of business where he rents trucks - the latest from Penske, so Penske, if you're reading this, you need to clean house on the people you rent your trucks to - and he parks them in front of his house until the business at the end of the street closes at which point he illegally parks in their lot.
I hate him and all his trashy family with the heat of a thousand suns, and so does my neighbor, so we spend a lot of time texting each other when we see them do something stupid so that we can call the city.
Have you ever had a shitty neighbor? Do pitchforks and torches work?
************
Don't forget - it's the Raw Photos contest this week. Andygirl and I can't wait to see what you've got. Submit your best PEOPLE pictures so that we can judge you. In a loving way.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Raw Photos Contest - It's PEOPLE! [Not to be confused with Soylent Green.]
The Raw Photos Contest is happening. RIGHT NOW. You've been ready and waiting, haven't you? I KNOW IT.
This contest's theme: PEOPLE
This isn't solely portraits. We want to see what your interpretation of PEOPLE is. Silhouettes, crowds, stick figures - we're open, it's totally up to you.
A review of the rules, in case you're new or have forgotten:
1. You have to have taken the photo [duh, don't be a jerk and enter someone else's photo. NOT COOL.]
2. The photo has to be a raw photo. What does that mean? That means NO PHOTOSHOPPING. You can screw around all you want with exposure and white balance on your camera, and we'll even let you crop the photo, but that's it. No changing hues. No intensifying colors. No adding aliens or unicorns. RAW PHOTOS, baby. That's what we're looking for. (Both digital and digital scans of film are okay)
3. You have one week to enter a photo. You can enter up to two [2] photos per contest.
Once all the photos have been entered, we'll take a few days to look them over. When we decide who the winner is, that winner's photo will be posted on our blogs Crazy with a side of Awesome Sauce or The Suniverse, our Twitter feeds @andygirl or @TheSuniverse, and on Flickr. Plus, the winner gets an AWESOME BADGE to post on their blog, showing the world that they have mad photography skills.
And if you have any questions, just ask:
awesomecrazylady@gmail.com
thesueniverse@gmail.com
Submit here.
We are PEOPLE who need PEOPLE and are the luckiest PEOPLE in the world.
Can't wait to see what you've got.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Week in Review - It's Raining, It's Pouring [It's Really Not - Unless It's Pouring Hellfire]
Oh, my darlings.
IT IS HOT.
Is that news? Probably not, but HOLY HELL, it's hot.
Also? I've got a temp job starting Monday PLUS I got a few freelance jobs in the past couple of days . . . so . . . I'm going to go down to posting two or three times a week for the next while. If the spirit or creativity moves me? Then I'll post more, but I know I won't be able to get shit done AND post anything even remotely worthwhile unless I have time to decompress. And also? I love that you love my writing, which makes me want to do more, which makes me want to FINISH WRITING ONE OF THESE GODDAMN NOVELS/MEMOIRS/COOKBOOKS on my laptop and sell the shit out of it so I can live a life of leisure and enjoy your company in my swimming pool filled with dubloons.
The plan is to start hosting a weekly GUEST POSTER THINGY, where on Tuesdays you can come here and vent or rant or just be awesome. Maybe do a little dance? It's all about choice. Because I love. Also, the husband has agreed to post on Thursdays. Do NOT believe a word he says.
What else is happening? I'm so glad you asked:
Some douchecanoe Republican representative in Florida [why is it always in Florida?] has sent out a screed against Representative Debbie Wasserman Schultz, who is the DNC Chair. Now, I get that politics is full of testiness and people disagree on stuff and things are said about each other's positions, but this guy's tantrum bugs me for this reason:
Serbian officials [perhaps some of Lori's in-laws?] have arrested the last remaining war crimes fugitive from the clusterfuck that was the dissolution of the former Yugoslavia. This guy will be transferred to The Hague and put on trial for his actions in the genocide of almost 300 men and the forced deportation of 20,000 people, among other choice acts. He had lived openly in Serbia until 2004, when he was indicted by the UN. He then went into hiding near his family home. How did no one check there?
I don't know why this hasn't happened yet. Oh, wait, I do. We are crazy prudes in this country who have no understanding of how having contraception covered by your insurance so that it's free would go a long way to saving money on SO MANY OTHER THINGS, not the least of which is the amount women are shelling out so they don't catch pregnant [because it's like a cold, right? I didn't have sex ed in high school.]. I know this is going to become a huge lightning rod, and that makes me angry and I am someone who DOESN'T EVEN USE CONTRACEPTION. TMI? Yeah, probably. But isn't that why you're here?
Evidently Rupert Murdoch is surprised and shocked that his newspapers in England would hack into private phone messages. Hmmm . . . I'm not sure if I'm buying it. I mean, maybe at ONE paper, you'd think "Rogue Editor or Reporter" but at pretty much all of them? And now there are facts coming out that his son, who also said he knew nothing about the phone hacking, actually DID know about it. That doesn't look good. I mean, if you're going to be a tool and do something illegal and disreputable, at least have the strength of conviction to go all the way and say, "Yes, I did it, suck on that." I would have more respect. I think that's why I like the mob.
And speaking of, in Bulgaria, it's PROJECT OCTOPUS! Evidently the mob is pretty much all over the place there, with crime boss Alexi "The Tractor" Petrov having been charged with all sorts of nefarious deeds.
What's new in your hood?
IT IS HOT.
Is that news? Probably not, but HOLY HELL, it's hot.
Also? I've got a temp job starting Monday PLUS I got a few freelance jobs in the past couple of days . . . so . . . I'm going to go down to posting two or three times a week for the next while. If the spirit or creativity moves me? Then I'll post more, but I know I won't be able to get shit done AND post anything even remotely worthwhile unless I have time to decompress. And also? I love that you love my writing, which makes me want to do more, which makes me want to FINISH WRITING ONE OF THESE GODDAMN NOVELS/MEMOIRS/COOKBOOKS on my laptop and sell the shit out of it so I can live a life of leisure and enjoy your company in my swimming pool filled with dubloons.
The plan is to start hosting a weekly GUEST POSTER THINGY, where on Tuesdays you can come here and vent or rant or just be awesome. Maybe do a little dance? It's all about choice. Because I love. Also, the husband has agreed to post on Thursdays. Do NOT believe a word he says.
What else is happening? I'm so glad you asked:
Some douchecanoe Republican representative in Florida [why is it always in Florida?] has sent out a screed against Representative Debbie Wasserman Schultz, who is the DNC Chair. Now, I get that politics is full of testiness and people disagree on stuff and things are said about each other's positions, but this guy's tantrum bugs me for this reason:
“You have proven repeatedly that you are not a Lady, therefore, shall not be afforded due respect from me!”The hell? This is particularly one of those times where I believe Amy Poehler had it right when she said, "I don't fucking care if you like it."
Serbian officials [perhaps some of Lori's in-laws?] have arrested the last remaining war crimes fugitive from the clusterfuck that was the dissolution of the former Yugoslavia. This guy will be transferred to The Hague and put on trial for his actions in the genocide of almost 300 men and the forced deportation of 20,000 people, among other choice acts. He had lived openly in Serbia until 2004, when he was indicted by the UN. He then went into hiding near his family home. How did no one check there?
I don't know why this hasn't happened yet. Oh, wait, I do. We are crazy prudes in this country who have no understanding of how having contraception covered by your insurance so that it's free would go a long way to saving money on SO MANY OTHER THINGS, not the least of which is the amount women are shelling out so they don't catch pregnant [because it's like a cold, right? I didn't have sex ed in high school.]. I know this is going to become a huge lightning rod, and that makes me angry and I am someone who DOESN'T EVEN USE CONTRACEPTION. TMI? Yeah, probably. But isn't that why you're here?
Evidently Rupert Murdoch is surprised and shocked that his newspapers in England would hack into private phone messages. Hmmm . . . I'm not sure if I'm buying it. I mean, maybe at ONE paper, you'd think "Rogue Editor or Reporter" but at pretty much all of them? And now there are facts coming out that his son, who also said he knew nothing about the phone hacking, actually DID know about it. That doesn't look good. I mean, if you're going to be a tool and do something illegal and disreputable, at least have the strength of conviction to go all the way and say, "Yes, I did it, suck on that." I would have more respect. I think that's why I like the mob.
And speaking of, in Bulgaria, it's PROJECT OCTOPUS! Evidently the mob is pretty much all over the place there, with crime boss Alexi "The Tractor" Petrov having been charged with all sorts of nefarious deeds.
The administration of Bulgaria’s prime minister, Boyko Borisov, a former business partner of Mr. Petrov, has singled out suspected crime lords in a campaign called “Operation Octopus.” In an interview, Mr. Petrov denied the charges against him while twirling a stick with a plastic octopus stuck to its top. He also said he was contemplating running for president.I want to go to there.
What's new in your hood?
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Summer Memories
This is a Red Writing Hood prompt - it's fiction, so you may want to pass and just read about my hatred of GP again, if you want. Or check out Beckham's ass - they're both in the sidebar.
**********
Hey,
**********
Hey,
Remember that time we went to the lake? And you kept trying to get that perfect picture of someone diving off the dock? Where they'd be in the air, mid-arc, and in shadow, too, so they looked all moody?
I found that packet of pictures - they were stuck together from the damp in a box of old beach stuff. Do you think Purple Heart would even want a beach towel that smells like mold? Probably not, right?
Anyway, I found the pictures and tried to pry them apart. That mostly worked, except sometimes the backing of one picture would stay stuck to the front of the one behind it and it usually managed to obscure someone's face. I can guess some of the people, but I think you'd be better at putting names and faces together. You always were better at keeping track of stuff. And people. Hey, do you remember Kyle? What the hell happened to him? Did he fall off the face of the earth? The last thing I remember was hearing that he was going to join the army. Did he end up doing that?
I keep running into your mom. She’s doing well – kind of surprised to see me, like I’m not supposed to be here. I guess I’m not, really. That was never the plan. You and me, together forever, shaking the dust of this town off of our shoes, or however that hokey saying goes. You’d probably remember that, too.
I just wanted to send these along to you. I know that you’d have better memories of that weekend – better recall, more pleasant thoughts. Isn’t that the weekend you and Bridget hooked up? I seem to remember someone telling me that, at your wedding. I guess they didn’t realize that that was the weekend we were supposed to be planning our lives together.
Or maybe we did, just not with each other.
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